Copyright 1999

Lionel rang today from Brighton, heís feeling a bit tired and wonít be back for a
couple of days.. Something about Winston over doing things. Iím not sure why that
should make Lionel feel bad. Having someone overdoing it with me makes me feel

I did get to make it with Jason. He is the nerdiest, underdeveloped character you
could ever meet but I felt things in places no one has ever reached before. I did
manage to grab a ruler to measure him but it was in centimetres so it didnít mean very
much. All I can say is Iíve started to look at every thin, nerdy boy in the street in a
new light.

He didnít take much persuading either, what with Lionel being away and mum having
gone for a walk on the common. I had the pants off him quicker than you can say Jack
Robinson. I suddenly realised however that I didnít have any contraventions, Earl
having used my supply up the previous night. Jason just got some from Lionelís
cupboard. he seemed to know exactly where they were which would suggest that
something is definitely going on between him and Lionel.

Shane came over early and nearly caught me and Jason at it. I had to fake it with
Shane, even we girls need a recovery time, but he didnít seem to notice. I think he
made it with mum yesterday. The telephone conversation they had really turned him
on now he says heís thinking about older women all the time. Well, screw that, Iím
not waiting for him till Iím old. Lionel will have his nose pushed out as well as Shane
seems to have gone into reverse as far as heís concerned.

Never mind, Lionel still has half the town after him if Shane is to be believed
although I donít believe that for one moment.  He is very popular though and his
mobile rings a lot more than mine does.

Trace, my best friend, came over and was all excited about a guy she had met. She
nearly met her husband Earl, creeping out of my bed as well, but he got out the back
door just in time. Seems this guy came in to the Wimpy for burger, sausage, egg and
chips with apple pie to follow, and Trace just fell for him on sight. Just one tiny
problem, he is a transsexual, to be more precise a pre-op transsexual called Mary, and
Trace is worried in case she is turning into a lesbian.

I told her, she would only know that when Mary became a post-op transsexual. If she
still fancied him then, well maybe it would show that she does have lesbian
tendencies. In the meantime sheís meeting Mary on Saturday so weíll see how things
turn out. Only trouble is. Iíll have to rearrange my day, because if Trace is going to
see Mary, Earl will be at a loose end so to speak and want to come round and Iíll have
to do something with Shane. perhaps if Lionel is back, heíll take Shane. If not Iíll
have to have a word with mum.  Life is so complicated.

Iím not sure how Earl will cope if he finds out he is married to a potential lesbian
with a pre op transsexual lover. Probably wonít care twopence as long as he continues
to get it six times a week and twice on Sundays. I warned Trace to be careful when
Mary changes from a pre op to a post op. Earl might fancy her then himself. Heís a
randy sod, chases everything with two legs a dress and somewhere to do it. Trace is a
bit stupid though and thinks heís faithful. Huh ! Iíve even seen him giving Lionel an
odd look especially when he wears those flowery shirts he likes and those tight white
trousers that show his bum off nicely. 

Look at Shane, real manís man, well you know, butch, into menís things, nothing
Nelly about him at all and suddenly Lionel flashes his eyebrows and heís, bingo,
hooked. Being into menís things takes on a whole new meaning. Not that I know for
certain that him and Lionel actually practice anything but a girl usually has an
institution about these sort of things. Mind you an awful lot of women end up married
to queens and when it all comes out say Ďbut I never guessed !í My advice would be
look at the underpants. If they are Calvin Klein , think twice. 

Now Shane never wears Calvin Kleins, in fact most of the time he donít even wear
underpants. he did have a pair of union jack boxer shorts I bought him back from
Spain and a sexy, black jock strap I bought him from an Anne Summers sex party at
Mollyís house, but it all turned out to be just a front. In fact far from looking sexy in
the jock strap, it looked like he was wearing a surgical aid. he said it was too small to
contain him, but in reality his tummy is so big the strap slipped down and hung like
the feeding bag they put over horses heads.

Anyway, next thing, one telephone conversation with mum and Shane is suddenly
into older women.  As I said, Trace really is a bit innocent about men and their little
ways and of course, she doesnít know about Earl and me and I wouldnít say anything.
After all she is my best friend. 

Funny old life really.

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